Hear Ye! Since 1998.

Archived Posts for April 2000

Please note: The posts on this page are at least 3 years old. Links may be broken, information may be out of date, and the views expressed in the posts may no longer be held.
Apr 00


What is this? Give-Inferno-a-big-head-day? (Not that I’m complaining :)

• “Down with chris herring!” –SilverWeed
• “.and up with Stu, cause he kicks ass.” –SilverWeed
• “*Adam Sandler voice* Hear Ye! blows my fuckin’ mind, mein!” –Irish
• “Hear Ye is the greatest e/n site out there.  That’s my final answer.” –Spaz
• “Irish….my mother may have screwed an Irish potato, but never the likes of you….” –entdiablo
• “Is the “Croc Hunter” real or a croc of shit?!” –entdiablo (huh?)
• “Not only was there Canadian flags, but also horseshit on the stairs … whats going on here?” –Noddy (damn Canucks…)
• “Soccer is a derivitive from England of the words Association Football (the governing body of Brit soccer)” –Noddy
• “I watched this nature show where the kangaroos had these long, long erections.  Kinda hypnotic if you saw it yourself.” –RegBarc112 (only if you look at sheep in the same way…)
• “The next person to say “wazzaap” to me is going to get a cap in their ass. That, my friend, is a promise!” –Tom

Census Update

If you haven’t filled it out, please do. I’ve had quite a response – I’ve received more than half the target number of entries I would like in the past 24 hours, so I’m going to move the end date closer. It’s interesting to see how people are reacting to the “race/ethnicity” box. It seems that the word “Caucasian” evokes images of racism somehow and people hesitate when answering that field. One person has even refused to answer it on the grounds that “it shouldn’t matter”. Yes it shouldn’t and doesn’t matter, but they ask these questions about religion and race in real censuses. Why do they spend millions and millions doing censuses in real life? Same reason I’m doing it here, cept I’m not using the money of taxpayers to do it :).

Mobile Phone Transmission

Haha… Renai’s not happy about me linking that pic :) The things that happen when you’re drunk, eh? Shaf apparently was showing the pic around the office!

Apr 00


The 3-day week is over, I’m leaving the education department at work, it’s the start of the weekend and I’m heading in to the city. :) Too bad you yanks still have Friday to get through heh. The benefits of living 15 hours ahead. I wonder if some city derro is going to ask me for money tonight? Happened yesterday. Always does.


E/N Community Census. Everyone please fill it out as comprehensively as you can. Plugging it on your sites would also be appreciated! A big thanks to Solo for hosting the Cold Fusion (first time I’ve produced anything online with CF – it’s such a cool, easy and powerful development tool). Thanks to the guys who tested it, although since I reset the database, you’ll all have to resubmit too. (Solo, billyjoebob, Dennis, FA, Reb Optik and sonic).


It’s always intriguing to read diaries. Much more so diaries which you understand what the person is going on about. Found this online diary called Gypsy run by Beverly through Renai last night. She’s a first year student at UNSW living in college. What’s coincidental is that I was talking to another friend about a fatality that happened at UNSW a few weeks back when a truck rolled down a hill and crushed a girl. It happened on a Thursday, and had I not decided to skip uni that day, my normal route would’ve taken me right through the area where the accident occurred (near the Elec Eng building, I think). The conclusion was – the closer death is to you, the more it makes you pause and think about it. Perhaps due to the self-centered mindset of, “that could’ve been me”? Regardless, Beverly witnessed the accident first hand. An account that’s significantly more involving than the dry n e ws article that was written on it. The closer things are to you, the more interesting they are (obvious or not?). Nonetheless, I found this incriminating picture of Renai that made me crack up :). There’s also this and this. Sheesh. College students.

Free Parking Metre Tickets

I found out about this last night. You know the parking metres that spit out the tickets that you place under the windscreen? You can fool those machines and get free tickets. First, stick in a 10c coin. Next, get a $2 coin and insert it while hammering away at the cancel button. What should happen is that the $2.10 should roll out, but the parking meter will still register credit (it should say “overpaid $_.__”). Press the button that prints the ticket. Voila. Apparently if you roll in 2 $2 coins really quickly while pressing cancel you can get $4 credit, but I think that requires some practice.

True. True.

I can’t believe Associated Press pulled the plug on Elian/Superfriends. Anyone have a copy of the Flash file they can send me?


• “Inferno, do you like cheese?  If so, what kind of cheese? And I’m still confused by your use of the word ‘unmaimed’ or whatever.” –Spaz
• “Every time I take a shit, I sneeze.  Does this mean I am allergic to shitting?” –da5id
• “hahaha….I thought you said biological twitching. btw….I’m tired of that kind of riddle.” –G Starr
• “I could get a good look at a T-bone steak if I stuck my head up a bulls ass, wouldn’t you rather take the butchers word for it?” –Irish
• “ent diablo: I had sex with your mother 9 months before you were born. ‘Nuff said.                   I <3 Stu” –Irish
• “I take pride in sueing wired-abuse, maybe i shouldn’t sue them for what i am sueing them for, but i am gay. Crack is a fool.” –Stile (is it really?)
• “I’m downloading the On The Prowl 95mb version.  And yes, I’m on dial-up.  Uhg.” –RegBarc112 (I feel your pain, bro)
• “If football is called soccer in the States, then what’s soccer mean?” –KPC (don’t ask me, we call it soccer too. The Poms call it football. Football here is rugby.)
• “well I think it’d make a lot of sense to take away all the xerox machines in the world because of all the plagarism and priacy….” -G Starr
• “I love you man!” -Surebrec (this is getting worrying. Let’s hope it’s all Platonic.)
• “Wow, I shouldnt have eaten so much chili. BRB, I need a fan…” –Tom
• “Nice piece of eristic news for ya at www.smh.com.au – Heads you lose: jury tosses coin” –Bonhomme De Neige (that is scary… “only in America”)
• “*hug* :)” –G Starr (one person for HAA Day! :)
• “how fucking long is your haul to work everyday? sheesh” –Solo (I told you it was 2 hours each way!)

Riddle Ye! VI & Riddle Ye! V Solution

Courtesy of Bonhomme De Neige.

Riddle Ye V Solution
Let us label the 3 men A, B, and C. We shall designate a liar with the letter L, a truth-teller with T, and the one who tells both lies and thruth with M. There are only 6 permutations of the letters L,T, and M. Arrange them thus:

  A B C
1:T L M
2:T M L
3:L M T
4:L T M
5:M T L
6:M L T

Then we ask A “Is it true that the probability of getting a truthful answer from B is greater than that of getting one from C?”

Case 1: A says yes. This eliminates permutations 1 and 4. So C is not an M. Ask him “Are you the man who sometimes lies and sometimes tells the truth?” — depending on his answer you know whether he’s a liar or a truth-teller. Then ask him whether B is a the man who lies and tells truth.

Case 2: A says no. This eliminates permutations 2 and 3. So then B can’t be an M. From there same as above, really.

Riddle Ye VI
You have 12 coins, and you know one (and only one) of them is counterfeit. You know the counterfeit coin weighs differently from a real one, but you don’t know whether it weighs less or more. You have a balance (not a set of electronic scales =P), and you are allowed 3 weighing to determine which coin is the counterfeit. How do you do it?

Send SMS Page Is Not (Linux) Netscape Compliant

Bonhomme De Neige points to this.

On Travelling…

Gavern wrote:

Hey man, you have my sympathies – just saw your *travel log* showing the 7:05am to 8:55am journey time. Urghhhhh.

Couple of years ago I lived in Richmond & worked in Pymble. Even by motorbike that was an hour each way, which was a great ride both ways – especially through Galston Gorge.

But I CAN understand the horror you go through each morning and evening, ‘cos there was a 3 month period when the bike was off the road that I had to train it every day – 6:30am to 9:00am and 5:00pm to 7:30pm with changes at Riverstone, Blacktown, North Sydney and EVEN sometimes at Gordon.

Bugger that for a joke – I now work in the heart of the city and live a 5 minute walk away, less than 1 km. But still I ride to work sometimes – just for the fun of cutting up the traffic!!!  (Well, in Perth anyway…..)


That’s a hell of a lot of line changes! And 2.5 hours is a killer travel time…

I don’t drive in because (i) Petrol Prices, (ii) Parking in North Sydney (or the city) – there isn’t, (iii) You can’t sleep and drive (and live) at the same time. Incidentally I got into UNSW’s Week 8’s Blitz magazine, in the travel article.

Mysteries of Sleep

Seems that hormones are responsible for our quality of sleep.


ADSL finally! Telstra claims 90% coverage of Australia by 2002 with rollouts beginning August. Hurry the hell up. Thanks to Fuzz *”* for this bit of news and the next bit:

Mobile Phone Posts

[27/3/2000 01:40:03] –== Inferno’s Whereabouts over the next 24-Hours ==–
[27/3/2000 01:50:04] Home (And going to bed)
[27/3/2000 07:05:05] Leaving Home
[27/3/2000 07:35:10] Campbelltown Station
[27/3/2000 07:45:11] Leumeah Station
[27/3/2000 08:10:05] Panania Station
[27/3/2000 08:50:05] North Sydney
[27/3/2000 08:55:10] At the Salt Mines
[27/3/2000 12:55:06] Lunch
[27/3/2000 17:35:03] Leaving Work
[27/3/2000 17:45:04] North Sydney Station
[27/3/2000 17:55:02] Town Hall Station
[27/3/2000 18:05:03] Town Hall Steps
[27/3/2000 18:15:03] Why are there Canadian flags flying at Town Hall?
[27/3/2000 18:45:04] Chinatown
[27/3/2000 18:50:02] Dinner
[27/3/2000 21:20:04] Town Hall Station
[27/3/2000 21:35:04] Central Station
[27/3/2000 22:00:05] East Hills Station
[27/3/2000 22:20:05] Campbelltown Station
[27/3/2000 22:45:03] Home

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Perl Poetry

Before I go… Perl.com’s Perl Poetry contest results (poems in this tarball).

Apr 00

What I Accomplished Today

As you can see by the frequency of posts, I’ve done pretty much nothing today but surf the web. Why? My supervisor didn’t turn up, nor did anyone else that could’ve given me work (they’re all on leave, apparently). Bleh. I also changed the mobile phone update script so those posts go into this section (remote posts) instead of the section at the top. I’ll have to install it later.


GeForce 2 specs.

Gadgets & Gizmo Obsessions

Yep, sounds like me (NYTimes link, requires registration, which although free is a bit of an annoyance). I wouldn’t have gone so far as to actually say this, though (in reference to a Palm): “You have a sense when you hold one of these devices that you’re grasping some distillation of human knowledge that represents centuries of evolution — and here it is.” I love gadgets.


Been a while since I’ve been to Icepick, but if you want to see connectivity, this is it. Y’know what’s a good idea… an alarm that sends you an email or SMS to tell you if you’ve left a fridge door open… or an automatic garage door up.


Aussie Blogs.

Communal Crier

Proper update when I’m home. New is Motherbrain.org. More where that came from.


Oh yeah, they have started showing Voyager Season 4 on channel 9 now, but I’m not doing reviews for it.

Idle Thought

The things you think about when you have nothing to do… You know how each time a new year begins, and you have to write the date – you keep writing last year’s year out of habit? (eg: 98 instead of 99) I’ve only just realised that I’ve never written 99 by mistake instead of 00. Intriguing. Ok, not really, but it seemed so at the time.

From the Archives

Uni Pranks.

Mobile Phones

So, mobile phones can cause memory loss, muscle pains, death (in more ways than one), cancer, and even diarrhoea. Of course, they may still save you from heart attacks. The human race is doomed. Also, Aussies and mobiles.

On The Prowl

I’m even later with this “news”, but BAMF’s first episode of On The Prowl is out. Another overnight download to queue :/

ICQ 2000

Ok I’m a bit slow, but ICQ 2000a Beta is out.

Mobile Phone Posts

[26/3/2000 11:52:27] If you are reading this, it means posting to Hear Ye! with my mobile phone has been successful! Cool.
[26/3/2000 12:04:04] I can just tell that this is going to keep me entertained the whole day…
[26/3/2000 12:06:02] Crontab test.
[26/3/2000 12:11:01] I wish I had this working this morning when Cityrail kept me waiting 30 minutes to buy a damn train ticket.
[26/3/2000 12:25:08] Connectivity, baby.
[26/3/2000 16:00:08] Only one more hour till I knock off from work :)
[26/3/2000 22:20:02] Experimental idea for tomorrow: post my location as I move from home to the city. I’m still in the city… gonna be dead tired tomorrow :/

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They can’t be serious. No, they actually are. O’Reilly Publishing is releasing Evil Geniuses in a Nutshell (A User Friendly Guide to World Domination), for “a newer, younger audience who are fans of User Friendly but are not as familiar with O’Reilly.” It would look odd, but damn funny amongst all the other O’Reilly technical books on the shelf :)

Apr 00


WapMeBaby has gone live. It’s run by BlueSkyFrog, the same people responsible for SMSMeBaby.

Hug An Australian Day

You heard right, it’s Hug An Australian Day! :)

Apr 00

Communal Crier

From Intek (those are some swank prizes, but why do I get the feeling they are… OEM versions? :) –

Misunderstood & Ellicit will be holding the “Design A Splash Contest” for 1 month (4.23.00-5.23.00). We want it to really be big so we are asking your help. All we ask is that you plug us and tell people about it. Thanks man. Http://misunderstood.convicted.net and http://www.ellicit.org


1st Prize: Your choice of Windows 2000 Professional , Office 2000 Premium , Adobe Photoshop 5.5 or Quake III Arena. Also your splash will appear on either Misunderstood or Ellicit.
2nd Prize: Office 2000.
3rd Prize: Quake III Arena

• Alligator
• Jackshit.org
• Jagged Mentality


• “Something’s wrong with the soapbox *twitch*” –Spaz
• “Narf, efnet #e/n. Irish sucks.” –SilverWeed
• “What the hell does ‘unmaimed’ mean??  I looked it up at dictionary.com but it wasn’t listed.  I’m so confused.” –Spaz (uh… it’s a fabricated word stemming from “maim”)
• “The easter bunny is after me!  Save yourself!” –Surebrec
• “Is Foster’s REALLY Australlian for beer?” –KPC (Of course. If you came to Australia and asked for Foster’s, you’d get beer.)
• “i don’t see a big difference in weblogs and e/n sites…  just a difference in the people that do them.” –sonic junkie
• “Is “Irish” really Irish?  That would explain alot…” –ent diablo (actually, that is a very good point…)

DNA Computing

An informative, if technical, article about biological computing from Ars Technica.

Component #1

I’ve decided to start slowly start building a new computer system. The first component came in yesterday with my relos flying in from the US. A half gig of PC133 CAS2 RAM. Now once my bank account recovers, I need a CPU, Mobo, Video card, cooling equipment and a case before I can do anything. I plan to buy a P3 100MHz FSB chip so I can overclock it by raising the FSB to 133MHz.


The PK in PKZip stands for Phil Katz, creator of the compression format who was recently found dead due to alcoholism. I remember using that program from the command line in DOS days… It’s pretty amazing that the format has survived so long without being replaced by something else. Thanks Nick for the heads up.

From CNN

Swap MP3s, go to jail? Software piracy is a crime too, but we don’t see that ending anytime soon, do we?


The 100 meg demo download has begun. Should be done in… about 10 hours :/

Grandfather Hatt :)

Two seasons of toil and the Hell Prime Network has announced its decision not to can Watch The World Die. It has agreed, in fact, to broadcast its third season to us. Cheers to KillKrazy for having made it so far!

Communal Crier

• Cyber-funk
• Perverted Garbage Guys
• Silent Screams

• endo locusta credo
• Evil Oliver
• NFSV – which bears a uh… slight resemblence to /usr/bin/girl
• Uptohere (unmaimed)

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• “These aren’t houses you’re buying! These are stocks, they go down!” –SilverWeed
• “cut my life into pieces. this is my last resort.” –russ
• “Why doesn’t the stupid Trick’s Rabbit just steal the Tricks from the small, inferior children? He’s huge compared to them!” –Chibi Knt
• “I farted and it smelled like ranch salad dressing. Weird, eh?” –Irish (you again.)
• “Why the hell would Guess file a lawsuit against Wired-Abuse??  I loved that site.  Damn the man and his lawsuits!” –Spaz
• “shave my llama you crispy salty bacon rasher – you know it’s true stu – why do you persist in denying it?” –billyjoebob (uh. right.)
• “I posted porno… that is why baefed.com was suspended…  Is that so wrong???” –da5id (only if it violates your TOS)
• “If 2 wrongs don’t make a right, how the hell do you get one?” –KPC
• “Jesus loves you Inferno.” –Spaz
• “Quick, drink the evidence and hide the dick behind your head!” –Edge
• “Don’t shoot, I’m a human!” – Resident Evil 2 Intro quote” –David

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Can You Distinguish E/N from a Weblog from Layout alone?


“Re: Idle Thought…. yes.” –Solo (via SMS)

“re: idle thought: no.” –GStarr (via SMS)

yeah i see your point. i dunno i guess my site is a weblog more than anything else…and although the current layout is a result of my not caring so much anymore (but wanting something new looking) it isn’t the typical e/n stuff. i guess anyways. see ya. kyle

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Riddle Ye! V

Thanks to Bonhomme De Neige with an Easter riddle for yas:

This is a harder variant on the truth/lies riddle.

You are faced with 3 people. You know that one of them always lies, one always tells the truth, and one sometimes tells the truth and sometimes lies, but you don’t know which one is which. The three people, however, all know who is who. What are the 3 yes/no questions you can ask of them (not necessarily one question each — you can ask all 3 of one person, or 2 of one and 1 of another, etc.) that will tell you which one is which?

Happy Easter.
— Bonhomme de Neige


Biggest collection of video clips I’ve seen yet of people doing stupid things. Absolutely hillarious and not doing wonders for my bandwidth.

Truly Bizarre

On a search for world records, I came across this. Uh… it’s… crazy, to say the least. Probably for mature audiences only :). It even comes with a dictionary of unusual sexual terms.

Mission To Mars

I wonder if there wasn’t some message in this to NASA and co. to stop screwing about and do something. Just about every human, sci-fi fan or not, has a certain fascination with space. I’m sure you’ve thought at length at one stage or another about this “final frontier”. Whilst some people have branded Mission To Mars as being too simplistic, I reckon it was quite effective in what it did. A sort of attempt to rekindle out imagination and interest in spacefaring. Public interest has always been there for this sort of thing, but I’m guessing no where as strong as, say, when Man set foot on the moon. The realistic special effects touched on such fascinating things as weightlessness, the vacuum and coldness of space, micrometeors and of course, artificial gravity caused by rotation. The date the film was set in was 2020, which I believe is realistic. The barrier as to when Man gets to Mars is certainly not technological, but economical and political.

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Apr 00

Idle Thought

Can you instantly distinguish a weblog from an e/n site just by layout alone? (Say you were looking at the monitor from a distance and couldn’t read any words…)

Apr 00

As seen via BAMF

Well, there’s an article that’s been written up about e/n. Fair bit of a generalisation. Are we really to believe we are all as nihilistic like we are made out to be? I would say that the community is “misunderstood” (even by those within it), but that has the distinct undertones of teen angst. And we wouldn’t want that, would we?

Communal Crier

• Thou art god

• 7-5-7

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• “great page, man. Keep up the great work. — http://koalamonkey.cjb.net” –Jimmi Love
• “dont get obsessed with the value of your stock portfolio.” –SilverWeed
• “Bah, menus = long load time on cable =(  Lots of US companies have been doing the pricematch thing for awhile… 155% =)” –Golar (the menus don’t tax your bandwidth, they seem to be cpu intensive, strangely enough)
• “Wow, you can get messages on your cel? Thats awesome!” –John

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Tournament.xls -> Tournament.cfm

Remember this? Solo is making an online version since the macro behind the Excel version doesn’t track users properly. He is currently compiling a list of chicks and urls to a pic of each one. He wants you all to go and help him out. This ought to be interesting…


Season 5 finale of DS9 tonight.


The scenario I posed about an overwritten MBR was hypothetical. What I basically wanted to find out was, how to restore the Win 2000 boot loaded (O/S chooser) in the event it is overwritten. The answer appears to be (apart from using a third party bootloader like Powerquest’s BootMagic or even Lilo) using the Win 2000 emergency disk (or maybe the FIXMBR command Dennis wrote about). Thanks for everyone’s input. This is just useful stuff to know about in advance of it actually happening (as may happen when WinME comes out and everyone dual booting decides to upgrade from Win98).


Soccer players get amorous. Thanks Pete :)

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Seti Stuff

Get more details and stats with SetiSpy. Retrieve several work units in advance with SetiCache so you don’t have to reconnect to the net in order to start processing another work unit. As well, there’s SetiWatch (which allows you to view the status of SAH on other computers on the network) and SetiLog, which logs past work units. And trayer is also a really nice program which allows you to move programs from the task bar into the system tray (or hide them completely if you so desire!). And here’s a plug.

SMS Spam

People, people… SMS spam is no different from E-Mail spam!!! Stop forwarding them on. Haven’t you wondered why it’s weird that they only started appearing after Optus made SMSes free? What’s the bet they’ll disappear once the free SMS offer is over? Geez…

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Check It

Oh yeah, I got this didn’t I? Thanks Irish.

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Apr 00


Whoo… logged on to a Win 2000 server with terminal server. It’s a nice dual CPU box with 1.2 gig of ram :) Anyhow. Would anyone know the answer to the following. If you created a dual boot machine loading Win98 first then Win2000 after (since Win98 has a nasty habit of overwriting the MBR), and then you were later to upgrade to WinME from Win98, would WinME setup screw around with the MBR, thereby causing the Win2000 O/S chooser to become inoperable (can’t select Win2000 on bootup)? Better still, if you install Win98 after Win2000, how would you restore the O/S boot menu for Win2000? Anyone?

Sense My Suffering

• “Hey, why dont you just stop calling me, asshole.” –SilverWeed
• “I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, so I was releived when he told me all I needed was blinker fluid.” –da5id
• “I think Mr. DeGusta is gay.” –wabut

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Bigger Is Better

Except when you can’t get the damn thing through the door. My cousin is looking at buying a Toshiba 61″ (155cm) rear projection TV. A friend recently got a 50 incher, and I was pretty impressed with its size, so we pulled out the tape measure and measured out 61″. I was even more impressed. However, Toshiba had a larger 65″ model HDTV (shipping in a 224 kg package). It didn’t stop there. Although 61″ is pretty much the largest set obtainable in Australia, apparently there were 70 inchers around, so we started looking around the net for larger TV sets. We came across a Mitsubishi 73″ (185cm). That’s big. But it seems the Japanese have taken up the Yank adage that “bigger is better” with a little too much zeal and, unsatisfied with a behemoth 73″, have produced an 80″ (203cm) rear projection TV. Which is all fine and good until you realise that most Japanese apartments are smaller than the cardboard box these units would ship in (I mean, when you have hotels like this, space is a definite luxury – they aren’t side loading washing machines, nor are they cryogenic stasis tubes. Each door leads to a hotel “room”). The TV is 30″ deep, which means if you want to fit it through a normal sized doorway, you’ll have to remove the door, and door frame to fit it through. It towers at 74″ high (188cm) and has a screen larger than some of the smaller cinemas on George Street.

But wait, what if you want bigger? You’d have to go for a front projection unit. How about the Vidikron Kronos One, which projects an image up to 250″ big. Not the largest, but who could pass up a projection unit that is Pininfarina designed? (Y’know, the guy that designs Ferraris. Now you too, can have his logo, if not in your garage, then in your TV room). Of course, the Sony JumboTron has the last word in giant displays, although it isn’t exactly for the consumer yet. But only because the Yanks are waiting for the price to drop.

Deroes on the Net

This homeless (but obviously not homepageless) guy wants your money.

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Oh For Goodness Sake

Geez, I’m on a 33.6K connection! This is absurd.

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Wise Move?

I sense a bankruptcy coming on with Onlinewarehouse: “Prove to us that you can purchase any advertised product on this site for less, and we will beat it by 10%! To claim this offer, fax or email a *newspaper/magazine advertisment or a *URL pointing to the proof.

Apr 00

Communal Crier

• Pretender.net

• Page of Misc

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S – M – S

• “boo” –Ian
• “If you choose to accept this message, your cell phone will self-destruct into little spiders that will crawl into your ears and an” –da5id
• “Lollie pops own”, “Up with cheese!”, “Irish 0wnz” –spaz
• “So how’s the tuna?  I hear they’z in season this time of year!  Bow.  Now.  How.  Brown cow.  More to come.  — CUT TRANMISSION!!!” –spaz
• “CUT THE TRANSMISSION DAMN YOU!  DAMN YOU, I SAID <i><b>DAMN YOU</i></b>!!!!  Damn you.  — CUT TRANSMISSION BABY (oh yea)” –spaz
• “Yay! Inferno is back, stu post my sms’s dammit!” –SilverWeed
• “Nigga nigga get a table dance! (stern rules!)” –Tom
• “Dear John: I have a dead alien, what should I do?” One word: Barbucue. –RegBarc112
• “3 Hierarchical Menu Trees totally suck!” –Shakespear
• “sms.. apparently?” –name
• “`;]” –nikon
• “I don’t see what’s so great about Aherdofturtles. He’s just gay… Wait!” –Chibi Knt
• “there is a guy outside putting rocks on my mailbox. He has been working hard all day and I think he deserves some cookies. :)” –gstarr
• “don’t be lazy! inferno! inferno! where are you! don’t give up! if you beleive in fairies, clap your hands!!” –gstarr
• “I got five on it.” –DJ

  9:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  SMS  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Cityrail: Signals

Burgatron reveals the secrets of cityrail signals (thanks mate!). Something I’ve always wondered about… [Post modified to account for early-morning-email-typos]

Well, signal faliures are when the signals stop working, (just like when the traffic lights blank out or stop working). What mostly happens is the signal stays at red (stop) when it should go back to green. Most signals have a trip device on them… if you look down on the ground near a signal you will see a white arm pointing up on a 45 degree angle or just pointing down. When the signal is at stop, the arm should point up (about 45 degrees). Trains have a trip valve connected to the brakes. If a train goes past a red signal, the trip valve hits the white arm, the brakes come on and the train stops. This is so trains can’t just drive round willy nilly without obeying the indication of signals. So, another reason a signal may have failed is that the signal is green but the arm has stayed in the raised position. When the train goes past the green signal, it will trip its brakes, and then the train will have to stop and wait a few mintutes till the air fills its brakes again.

What I want to know now is, what happens when the signals stay at green, when they should be red? Hrm…

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Relos coming over from Singapore and the US this week (yes I have um… yanks for… relatives). I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing (they better not read this).

  9:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Life  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Star Trek DS9: In The Cards (Ep 5.25)

Easily one of the best episodes this season, it’s a down to earth comedy that tracks Jake and Nog’s attempts at getting hold of an elusive baseball card (I remember doing this with comic cards back in year 9). Along the way they have to trade a whole bunch of miscellania to get the card off a person who is working on a way to live forever via a “cellular entertainer” (this concept provides a few cute moments, like when the kids try to explain it to Odo). Many scenes could be described as uh… “cute”, but not sickeningly so, and the episode closes up on an upbeat note (the scene when they are captured by the Vorta is even light hearted :). Wonderful episode.

Galaxy Quest

When an Aussie cinema audience gives a rare round of applause at the end of (and throughout!) a movie, you know it’s a winner. This movie is an absolute classic! One of the best parodies since Spaceballs, it’s been a long time since I laughed so much and so hard at a movie. Galaxy Quest is a send up of Trek and the Trek culture. It’s chock full of Trekkie in-jokes, but that doesn’t reduce its enjoyability to non sci-fi fans. The movie is cleverly written and sustains the laughter right through. Even though it’s a parody movie, which are notorious for B Grade special effects, they’ve not spared any expense with the special effects and they look wonderful. This film is perfect for a night when you want something to make you laugh your ass off :). Just watch it – you’ll love it. Something to get on DVD.

  9:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Movies  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Shogun: Total War

Total War looks incredible.

Apr 00

Communal Crier

• Dark Magnet (Booya! died, and in its place is Dark Magnet. Check out this schmick Aussie site. :)
• Desensitized
• Filespanker
• Kurtainz
• Lotion.org

• Funhouse

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SMS Backlog

• “Well, I don’t see what’s the big deal with Mahir.  He’s just gay.” –Aherdofturtles
• “Don’t you love me anymore?” –NOT IRISH
• “What does SMS mean? Single Male  Services?!?!?!? I hope so.” –SaltyBalz.net (crap, that might explain Irish)
• “Okay, Neo…look behind you. Those two men are Agents. Now, what I want you to do is….wait a minute. Oops. Wrong number. Sorry.” –KK (hahaha! This has got to be one of the most original SMSes I’ve got.)
• “Nothing get’s me hotter then a come hither loogie!” –Reb Optik
• “I’ll give your punk aussie ass a SMS.  ….. that was it.  *sigh*” –Jonez
• “Hol’ de do fo de bro wit da fro at da licker sto” –entdiablo

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Pimped from Shaf :) Thanks.

A sorority girl went to the doctor for a routine check-up. The doctor asked her to take off her shirt for a breast exam. When she did, there was a big letter T across her chest.  The doctor exclaimed, “What the heck is that?”

The woman replied, “My boyfriend plays for Tennessee and doesn’t like to take his shirt off during sex.”

“Oh, I see,” the doctor said.

The next week another sorority girl came in and had a big P across her chest.  The doctor said, “What the heck is that?”

She said, “My boyfriend plays for Pittsburgh and doesn’t like to take his shirt off during sex.”

“Oh, I see,” the doctor said.

The next day, another sorority girl came in and had a big W across her chest.  The doctor said, “Let me guess. Your boyfriend plays for Wisconsin, and doesn’t like to take his shirt off during sex.”

“No,” she said, “my girlfriend plays for Michigan!”

  11:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Humour  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

On Campbelltown Ticket Gates

Burga is a cityrail employee (signalman). Maybe now I can find out from him how the signalling works and why signal failures happen (what is a signal failure anyhow? Is it those traffic lights for trains? If so, why do they break down, because road traffic lights don’t.) Anyway, his reasons for reopening the gates are this:

the reason they dont use them is because they are scared…think of how many ppl out there dont buy tickets, think of the trouble that will occur when they ask these fuckin junkies and scum for tickets. To much trouble ..i doubt that that the ticket collecting will go on for long.
its probably only a publicity stunt.

Can Cooler

Some people have way too many spare computer parts.

Optus Free SMSing

Optus is running a nifty promotion. Sourced from here. Thanks to Fuzz *”* for this!! Of course, the only reason why people go for Optus mobiles is because they have all the freebies (yes time, yes weekend, and now this). Otherwise it has the worst reception and service of the lot of mobile phone carriers.

Optus is offering free SMS messages until the end of May 2000 to Optus mobile digital customers (except Optus Express, Optus Analogue, MobileSat and Optus CDMA customers). So now is a great time to talk without talking by sending text messages to most compatible mobile digital phones connected to a GSM mobile network within Australia. This promotion is available 24 hours per day, 7 days a week from 12/4/2000 until 31/5/2000.

Seti@Home E/N Team

If you’re running Seti@Home, and haven’t joined a team and want to do so, here’s one you can hook up with :).

  11:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  E/N  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 
Apr 00

No Updates?

I’m not getting enough sleep. I turned up late to work today, not that it mattered since the marketing department here (which seems to consist of all of 2 people) are managing a Win2K seminar in the city. When you run on about 5-6 hours of sleep each night, the fatigue’s gotta strike sooner or later, and after a few weeks of it, it’s hitting me now. This can’t be healthy. And if what they say is true about a temporary “virtual loss” of 1 IQ point per each hour of sleep you miss (under the requisite 8 hours), I’ll be a vegetable soon (heh, temporarily spastic :). Yes, I’m still getting your e-mails and SMSes, but I haven’t actually been able to update at home.

Apr 00

Exchange Rate

It dropped below 60c to the US Dollar, and is slated to fall to 55c. The Aussie dollar is now ranked the 7th worst currency in the world. Screw Dat!! No more buying from Amazon for a while…


5K Competition Finalists.

Apr 00

Portable MP3 Players

This may be good (off Fuzzy’s), but this is better. And cheaper. And looks nicer :).

Communal Crier

• The Kraft

• Guruchild.com

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• “Umm…. mouse odometer?  I’m not gonna even ask why someone would use it =)” –Golar
• “Irish sucks! <3 Jason” –Jason
• “You didn’t post my sms; did I trick you or are you ignoring me?” –SilverWeed (what sms?)
• “You DO realize that I’ll send you the series finale of DS9 on tape with express mail” –RegBarc112 (yes, please! :)
• I’m not posting Irish’s SMSes anymore. Not when you can see them on Ramblings.

  11:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  SMS  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

I Don’t Believe It

They started using the ticket gates at Campbelltown station. They’ve been sitting there for about 10 months, disused. I give it one week before someone takes to them with a baseball bat.

  11:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Life  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 


I’ve come to the conclusion that Magnolia is a semi-optimistic existentialist film. Only because that’s what I’m doing in one of my subjects at uni right now. (But hey, it’s true – Magnolia is quite existentialistic.)

  11:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Movies  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

The Fifth Franchise

The 5th Star Trek series is to be entitled “Birth of the Federation”. It’s set a little back in the Star Trek timeline, picking up where First Contact left off. Strange concept – I wonder if it will work at all? It’s slated to start up in Autumn (US), 2001. Sourced from here. On the side, George “Starving broke actor looking for job” Takei is pushing for a new series starring Captain Sulu and the adventures of the Excelsior. Heh.

Apr 00

Communal Crier

Hey, Spore’s Den is finally back up and running! About bloody time. Thanks to Noddy for the heads up.

• The Day To Day – Run by Brits! That’s rare.


• “How much are you willing to pay for sex? My prices are 15 dollars/hour on weekdays and 20 dollars/hour on sat/sun. Open 24-7” –SaltyBalz
• “Haha, you and your little southern hemisphere friends are getting DS9 episodes now that were shown in the States 3 years ago.” –RegBarc (shut up and stop tormenting me. :)
• “Hey Stu, how did you get SMS on the net??  Is there some file or something?” –Aherdofturtles (It’s magic. Ok, so it isn’t. Well, my phone is hooked up with an e-mail account which routes smses to me.)

Derailed Train

Last Thursday (or was it Friday?), 5 carriages of a train derailed off platform 1 of Redfern. Burgatronics has a pic of it. I saw it on the way to work. I don’t think anyone besides the driver was on it, though, but it’s a worry…


Although I couldn’t quite put a finger on what the points of this movie were, it managed to maintain my attention for the full three hours it ran for. Not an easy task. If there was a point to it all, it was incredibly elusive. Every time you think they are getting somewhere, they snatch the “somewhere” away and start again. True, it got annoying, but I still found some of the things in it interesting. Quite a cerebral movie, good for a quiet night out. And since I can’t offer a review of it because I still haven’t worked out for sure what it was about, just go to IMDB for a review. It’s a review I would agree with.

One thing I noticed. Both this movie and The Beach have both had narrators making some comment along the lines of “it’s something you always see in the movies” (and of course, we are fully conscious that we are watching a movie).

Apr 00

Communal Crier

Do you notice that no where on the side bar, is there a mention of the terms “e/n” or “weblog”?

Ramblings has celebrated their one-year anniversary with a redesign. About time (heh, like I should talk).

• 4AM
• The Kazm

• Intermittent (formerly Ciphon)

• Bombshelter
• News from the Far Side of Venus
• Ramblings

FYI, this is not a good way to ask for a link: “We have been linked by sites like bunkford, cracker-jap, and even a rare front page link on Newgrounds.com I was wondering if you guys would like to join this list?”


My mobile is still acting as a conduit for a flame war.

• “Riddle me this, riddle me that… How the fuck do I skin a cat??” –Da5id
• “E-Z SON, gg, $$” –Shakespear
• “Sex. Tba. Mother, any questions? Btw, ramblings.net m0f0!” –Silverweed
• “ahh so I had my 3 secs of fame on ur site by sending u my 1st msg eh? *grinz* Have a good one! :)” –Velle
• “i just broke $9,000,000 in dopewars – hoe much bacon can you buy for $9,000,000?” –billyjoebob
• “I GOT MAD HOES YO! Check out Ramblings.net, womens wanna do it wid me!” –Irish
• “Army of Hatred 0wnz.  Down with Canada.  Death to Stile.  Up with communism!  Up with the metric system!  We love Irish.” –Spaz
• “wtf? r u ok stu?” –billyjoebob
• “Post the SMS’s damnit!!!!  (Irish suX0rz)” –Spaz
• “Inferno is dead! Someone else is taking over posting for him, its true!” –Spaz (I can neither confirm nor deny that statement)


On List-en: “My mobile phone is getting spam which is pissing me off. :)” (That wasn’t me, btw :)

Asian Version of Mahir?

This link has been circulating the e-mail rounds a lot lately. Five mails in the last three days with it. [Who’s Mahir?]

Riddle Ye! IV

I only got two answers to this. And they are both UNSW students in the school of comp sci and engineering. Welp, the answer can be found here (see Question 5 and you’ll understand). Correct answers from:

• “That riddle would be harder if describe hadn’t been used as a comp 1A tute question again last week. :)” –Shish
• “31131211131221” is the next line :)” –Shaun

Shish also went and wrote a haskell program to calculate the 40th instance. How big do you reckon the 40th instance would be? Take a look.

The Beach

I still don’t like DeCrapio. But, the film was good. Vaguely Lord of the Flies in that Paradise is not as clear cut as complete freedom, a warm and supposedly tight-knit community, a beautiful beach, and an unlimited supply of dope.

Mouse Odometer

My mouse odometer just hit 15kms.

Mark My Words

I can see the wireless comms/tech industry really booming in the next 2-3 years. If it’s an industry I could get into, I would. And Bluetooth is a prime example of this. Especially since it is a technology standard that is not owned by a single entity. And since it’s been backed up by Microsoft (who have a habit of defining their own standards), amongst many others, it’s gotta go somewhere.

Star Trek DS9: Empok Nor (Ep 5.24)

An unusual episode of Trek. Effective lighting created a gloomy and surreal mirror image of Terak Nor (aka DS9). It’s an episode containing suspense of the shock type. This is the only episode of Trek which has made me jump – something I totally did not expect. Credibly done, it’s only when Garak is affected by the psychotropic drug does the episode move into a “second plot”. Garak tries to bring out the primal instincts of O’Brien, goading him and trying to induce him into “going psycho”, continutally referring to O’Brien’s time as a soldier. However, O’Brien manages to contain himself somewhat. Unfortunately this was not wonderfully executed. Especially to see the closing scene where Garak and O’Brien resolve things. I couldn’t help but think back to the episode where O’Brien was “virtually imprisoned” by the Argrathi (Hard Time) and pushed to, and over, the edge. In this episode, O’Brien endures 20 years of hardship before he snaps and his “evolved sensibilities” crumble. When you think of how Garak only has a few hours to provoke him, and how O’Brien has gone through the immense psychological trauma in Hard Time and has had to recover from that (he probably still has the occasional nightmare about it) it’s not hard to see how he managed to keep his wits. Colm Meaney’s one of the better Trek actors.

Three more episodes left in the season.


A couple, both age 67, went to a sex therapist’s office. The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?” The man said, “Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?”

The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed. When the couple finished, the doctor said, “There’s nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse,” and charged them $50. This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have intercourse with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.

Finally the doctor asked, “Just exactly what are you trying to find out?”
The old man said, “We’re not trying to find out anything. She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house.

“The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare.”

Useful Portal

I could see some uses for this portal. Does anyone know of a reverse phone directory for Australia?

Tell Me

How did this startup Aussie firm get $8 million investment for their first 6 months of operation? K*Grind is aimed at channeling broadband media to the youth market. Unfortunately Australia lacks broadband in a major way.

Apr 00

Communal Crier

Is it just me, or is there a convergence of e/n sites towards “e/n networks” and away from hypermart and virtualave *cough*ramblingsworlddomination*cough*?

• Canadian Bomb
• Somatica

• Homicidal Maniacs

  10:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  E/N  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 


• “Shakespear: Your site sucks assvomit. Get a new fucking layout you pansy. Oh Inferno, I was whacking and my dick started to bleed.” –Irish
• “Palm SUCKS, and why arent you on the BAMF irc server? oh, and i already sexed tba’s mother good, sorry :(” –SilverWeed (darest thou insult the Palm?! heresy!)
• “bacon” -billyjoebob (someone has a fixation with frying pigs)
• “what’s that website again? its like ub/ss/girl or something. you said I could win something shiny by going to it. :)” –GStarr (It’s /usr/bin/girl – I’m not sure what happened to the contest)
• “whee! I got 361,575 on dopewars…(it WAS luck, darnit)” –GStarr
• “Roger, reading u 5 by 5, pupa zulu alpha 632, SIR” –WaD
• “stumbled upon ur page fr a link.. good one there :)” –Velle (wow, a new name!)
• “The answer to the riddle is: “I like to bang indians.” “Take you to my house, on the couch, ya. Knock your pussy out, ya!” *rambli” –Irish (haha! message truncated before he could get the plug in!!)

To Irish I say: Get A Life. I just got a barrage of 14 SMSes from him which I refuse to put up. The last one read: “Ok, that was the first part and the main chorus… its juveniles Back dat azz up.  Ill send you the rest in your mail.”

  10:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  SMS  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Google/Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

I reckon at least 90% of the questions asked on Who Wants to be a Millionaire? can be found within 20 seconds and within 2 mouse clicks via Google (or maybe the Encyclopedia Britannica DVD?). They never said sitting in front of a computer is illegal, so why not arrange with a friend on the “phone-a-friend” lifeline to sit on a computer with a really fast net connection awaiting the phonecall? Instead of telling him the question, give him the search query, and while the page loads, tell him the question :).

Riddle Ye! III – Solution

Ok I’m embarrassed. I screwed up yesterday. Sorry to billyjoebob and Atroxi – they weren’t 100% right but that’s being picky. All that needs to be changed with their answers is (pointed out by Bruiser): “Can’t you just ask that guy which way someone from the other tribe would tell you was safe?”

An alternate correct answer was given by F00bar and David:

If I were to ask you if that is the road to take to safety, would you say yes?”. Whichever the direction the tribesman points to, the man can be sure it’s the safe way. If the tribesman responds “yes”, he should go in the direction he is pointing. If the answer is “no”, he should take the other fork in the road.

Amongst the incorrect answers today, many people were trying to be tricky and said they’d ask the tribesman two questions – one to determine whether he told lies or the truth, and the other to determine which path to walk. The problem should’ve been qualified with “you can only ask the tribesman one question.” Still, it made for an amusing response from not the UNPC Phil: “An NBC-Made-For-TV-Movie-inspired solution: Grab each bastard and throw them down each road. See which one dies.”

Riddle Ye! IV

Resident riddlemaster Bonhomme de Neige has another one:

Well, at least someone got it. Meanwhile, put up this one (a bit obivous, yes, but we must cater for the Americans out there =))


what’s the next line? There’s an obivous pattern there too…

Bonhomme de Neige (if I can bother to type it out each time, surely you can too? =) )


For those in the Commonwealth countries:

The queen and the pope are standing on the balcony of Buckingham Palace in front of gathered thousands. Out of the side of her mouth the queen says to the pope, “I’ll bet you two Swiss Guards that with one small wave of my hand I can make every English person in the crowd go mad with delight.”

“Ok,” whispers the pope, “This I want to see.” So the queen waves, and the crowd goes wild, nearly ripping their flags with joy.

The pope is impressed, but not to be outdone. “Alright”, he says to the queen out of the corner of his mouth, “I’ll bet you two Beefeaters that with one small nod of my head I can make every Australian person in the crowd go insane with adulation and celebrate for days.”

The queen is certain that she’s on to a winner here, so she whispers, “Go on then.”

So the Pope headbutts her.

  10:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Humour  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 


MSNBC Mysteries Archive is a really intriguing read.
Useless Facts is for the times you’re bored.

Egyptians Find New Pyramid

Pretty interesting. Thanks Fuzz *”*!

Official Apology

The following conversion took place yesterday between me and Dom.

Dominic: why does my name appear not once but TWICE in sexual contextes on your page?
Inferno: hehe your guess is as good as mine :)
Dominic: i think you made up those two msgs. heh.
Dominic: with apologies to Roosh? wheres the apologies to Dom.. ? =/
Dominic: hehehe.
Inferno: ok tomorrow you will receive an official 10 page apology :)
Dominic: im fuckin quoting you on that. hehehe. <gets big stick labeled “Stu-Whacker” out>
Inferno: you may feel free to do so, I will follow up on that :)

So, here it is. An official 10 page apology in a PDF.

  10:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  E/N  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Think You’re Protected? HAH!

I find this incredibly ironic. Mobile phone users who think they are protecting their brains by using handsfree kits may actually be chanelling three times the amount of radiation into their bodies.

Warning issued about hands-free phone kits

LONDON (April 3, 2000 5:42 p.m. EDT http://www.nandotimes.com) – Hands-free kits for phones, designed to protect the health of cell-phone users, can actually increase levels of radiation transmitted to the brain, Britain’s Consumers’ Association warned Monday.

Researchers found two devices they tested acted as aerials, channeling three times as much radiation from the mobile telephone into the user’s head.

Sales of hands-free kits have rocketed amid reports linking mobile phone use to ill health, including possible brain tumors.

But test results from Which? — the trading arm of the Consumers’ Association — showed the devices did not provide protection.

“If you’re worried about levels of radiation from your mobile phone, you shouldn’t rely on a hands-free set,” said Graeme Jacobs, editor of Which? magazine.

“The two models we tested triple the radiation to your brain, though we still don’t know for certain whether that radiation is harmful.”

Jacobs said there was no conclusive evidence that mobile phone radiation caused health problems, but neither had the fears been discounted.

“International research is ongoing, but until conclusive evidence is available, users could limit their phone use if they are concerned about radiation,” he said.

Source: Nando Media. Of course, there’s still no conclusive proof that the radiation is harmful, but I don’t really believe that the radiation emitted is all harmless.

Apr 00

Communal Crier

• Cyclohexane – C6H12 if I remember chemistry from two years ago…


• “*wink*.. yep.. *wink* – you know.” –SilverWeed
• “codeine is really a GAY site, but i’m the only one who is able to realize it.” –Anonymous (Coward)
• “I am a sophisticated love machine sent back through time with one mission, to pleasure TBA’s mother.” –tin
• “I’m bored at work and feel like typing.  Indulge me.  :)  La la la la la la la la la.  Thank you, tip your waiter.” –atroxi
• “I THINK I SHOT A LEPRECHAUN!” –russ (does that mean you still get the pot of gold?)
• “Between downloading gay porn and messaging here Irish just doesnt have time for a social life” -Shakespear
• “Inferno.  Hear me.  Tonight, it ends.  No more.  It ends.  It must.  Farewell.” -Zeffe
• “The eagle has left the nest. The birds are migrating north. The square block has been put in the hole. Your days are numbered.” –Theseus :)
• “I’m jackin off to gay porn with Wrongforum and TBA in a huge gangbang as I type this.  Doesn’t that just make you so horney?” –Spaz (*shudder*)
• “Interesting conspiracy…well I’m returning my startac organizer for a palm v. This thing has been disapointing indeed.” –Roosh (go the Palm! :)

So That’s Where It’s From

Ok I know you don’t care about this, but half a year ago (2 Sep 99) a DS9 episode was entitled “…Nor the battle to the Strong” This made absolutely no sense, but today I was reading an article (yet another one playing around with babelfish’s mistranslation capabilities) linked off Camworld. Turns out the title is a Bible verse.

I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all. –Ecclesiastes 9:11

Ohhhhhh. I get it now.

SQL Server Course

What a nice break from work. A 5-day $2300 course provided completely free :). I even get a free $9 lunch voucher each day heh. SQL Server really rocks. (What a geeky thing to say, eh? :Þ)

Riddle Ye! III – Continued

Ok most of you didn’t read the riddle properly (see yesterday). Most said something along the lines of:

yeah yeah yeah ask either d00d what the other d00d would say – then do the opposite – then smack em both upside the head for gettin in yer way (billyjoebob)

You can ask the question to either of them…
“If I were to ask the other tribesman which path led to safety, what would he say?”
If you asked the one who always lies, he would then give you the opposite answer of the one who always tells the truth…so he would point to certian death. If you asked the one who always tells the truth, then he would give you the actual answer of the one who always lies…so he would also point to certian death. Therefore, you would take the path that they didn’t choose. It was on an old episode of “Doctor Who”…:) (atroxi)

Sound logic, but um… there is only one native there. This is not exactly the liar/truthful tribesman riddle. It’s a variant (I hope I’m right in saying that).

“Are you a liar?” (red scare)

Doesn’t work. Both will say “no” and that won’t get you anywhere.

Answer: If I were you, which way would you tell me to go? (Kevin)

This one doesn’t work either. I don’t think I’ve actually received the correct answer yet.


Hand in a bucket of warm water gives this result

Apr 00

Communal Crier

• Burgatronics
• File Not Found – Personal e/n site by Thess of Moonothing

Some More Stuff

• “irish: hey, I’m a drummer chick. Actually, a xylophone chick.” –GStarr
• “no! a bum chick! *har har, laughs at her percussive joke*” –GStarr
• “I dont know.” –FallenAngel
• “Baby make your booty go… mmm! Oohhhhh, yeahhh! I like (_(o)_) booooooooottty! Fluck U & u’r CAT, Penii.” –Irish
• “SMS = Shakespear Might Suck?:\ Alice in flucking Chains rocks your damn Hear Ye! site my Aussie friend. <3” –Irish
• “‹^›//‹[ˆ;ˆ]›\\‹^› – You a fine motha flucka? Why don’t you back dat ass up? My c0x is bigger than Ron Jeremys :)” –Irish
• “oooohhhhhhhh! ill make u a motha fing image dude why didnt u ask muhi negro? *ramblings.net*” –Irish (mate, don’t you have anything better to do than make my phone beep all day?)
• “You know when he fell down .. yeah near the mailbox cover in the street OMFG HAHA!” –SilverWeed
• “boo” –gfdsg (yes I know, bang the left hand on the keyboard and see what random letters come up)

Conspiracy Generator

Something the conspiracy generator came up with (with apologies to Roosh :)

“The UFO sightings Down Under are actually mass hallucinations engineered by Doug to make TBA and other enemies of Roosh think they are not alone. In the ensuing paranoia, Roosh and Stile plan to patent the term “e/n”. If you see UFOs, close your eyes – it’s all a trick. Meanwhile, a special task force led by Inferno is being set up to tackle the problem.”


Aureal is dead? Pity. The Vortex 2 produced really nice 3D sound.

Riddle Ye! III

Here’s another riddle to crack your head on. You may have heard this problem in another variant form.

A man is in a region where he knows there are two native tribes. One always tell the truth, and one always lie. He comes to a fork in the road, where a sign says “One path leads to certain death, the other to safety”. There’s a native tribesman sitting below the sign. What is the one question he can ask that will guarantee him safe passage?

Thanks to BDN for it! Mail solutions here.


Want to see something bizarre? It seems that the good old BX motherboards (with FSB overclocked to 133MHz and PC133 ram) run faster than the new i840 mobos with RDRAM (PC800 spec). See for yourself these stats. Full article here.


Palm has recently raised a Palm Developer’s site.

Apr 00

Communal Crier

• Hackerish.net

• Conspiracy

  7:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  E/N  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 


You’ve probably been getting messages that I’m out of credit. That’s what happens when I get too many SMSes. However, I still do eventually receive them, so just ignore that message.

• “Irish: Phew! For a moment I though you were going to threaten to kick my CAT!  Thank God your gonna kick the dog I don’t have.” –Penii
• “Where the hell are all these phils coming from!?!?!” –the real Phil (unpc)
• “SMS = Sega master system?” –Shakespear
• “Got Rice?” –sung
• “WTF?  You watched star trek?” –sung (every week there’s a review and you’ve only just noticed??)
• “Attn: Inferno. I will stand for this pink dot no longer, I challenge you to a battle of wits.” –Theseus
• “If I win, you’ll make my dot red. If I lose, you make my dot red. The game? Professional tiddlywinks. May the best man win.” –Theseus (how about seeing who can design a web page faster, you with notepad and me with FrontPage? :)
• “yes, ganymede is a guy’s name, I’m quite ashamed…actually, I think it’s a pretty name” –GStarr
• “I’m surrounded by preps. they’re everywhere. They’re wondering how much someone paid me to put a fish on my shirt.” –GStarr
• “also a mailbox just ran into my best friend’s car. he’s okay, though. I just don’t have a ride home right now.” –GStarr
• “Looking kinda lonely, put the dick in the middle like money. She beats on the dick like a mother fucking drummer chick.” –Irish
• “if u still need to open word doc… install star office… uninstall when done.” –Kaber
• “27 new messages no thannks to yours truly.  Got Rice?” –sung
• “Last time I tried this, it said you had no credit left…” –da5id
• “i will kill you until you die UNLESS you fix the fuckin “building menu” bull shit that makes hearye take like 20 secs to load.” –tba (you must have a shit computer cos the 486 at handles the menus in under 5!)
• “and im not kidding around with you. just because im 6500 KMS away doesnt mean i cant wreck you up BAD. heh.” –tba
• “It’s bad for women to get involved in karate and other activities, because it gives them ideas of being out of the kitchem. Bad.” –Justin
• “CHEEEEEESEEEE!” –Outsider
• “Wazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzup!? Aussie Pride ‘yo! You know space might be the final frontier, but its made in a hollywood basement:\” –Irish (under the guise of “Smelly Aussie”)

  7:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  SMS  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

No Posts…

…because for the last two days I haven’t been home except to sleep and shower. Mmm… weekend… and no more tech support for me! I’m outta the tech services department at work as of yesterday… After the SQL server course next week I go to the marketing (1 week), education (2 weeks) and accounts (1 week) department.

  7:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Life  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Astronauts Have Headaches, Too

I found this article on Wired really amusing.

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New Masthead

Thanks to Phil for generating this. It’s been added to the pool. Feel free to submit one (attachments ok).

I’d Like to See that

Pissed off commuters set fire to train when it runs late.

Accompany.com changes its Name

Funny, I was at accompany only a few weeks ago. Now it’s changed its name for reasons, such as:

It’s true that Accompany, the company’s old name, was less than felicitous. Say the name aloud, and it sounds like “a company.” As in: “Who do you work for?” “Accompany.” “Which company?” “Accompany?”



D&D to go Open Source?

Airport Pranks

Side-splittingly funny. You’ll need Microsoft Word to view this file [half a meg].

  7:00pm (GMT +10.00)  •  Humour  •  Tweet This  •  Add a comment  • 

Happy April Fools


Have you seen Brain Damage today?

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